I'm glad that you're alive

When it comes to birthdays, I'm really getting emotional. I would want to receive even a small gift, maybe a hanky or a friendship bracelet. So cheesy! Just petty things that I will not forget, for you have made me feel special and that you're happy because I was born and became your friend. The struggles that we had as a family already hindered me to celebrate my past birthdays in a grandious way. I don't have any bad emotions towards it. I was contented with pansit and a half gallon of ice cream that me and my siblings share. Those moments were priceless. The only thing that I remember something huge were my 1st and 7th birthday. On my first, I dressed as Superman. Back then, I cannot recall how happy I was but I'm sure I did enjoy my party.

Last year 21st of May, I came from work feeling agitated because I am about to go home to the Philippines. I thought my PAL flight from Singapore to Manila is at 2AM of the following day. I always lost my attention to details and that's my terminal illness. I slowly packed my things and enjoyed the remaining hours of the night. I took a cab to the airport around 12:30 AM. I was very complacent that 1 hour will cover checking in my luggage, wearing my best smile as I pass through the immigration officer and walking to the boarding gate before the plane takes off. While in the cab, I checked my ticket and felt overwrought when I found out that the aircraft was set to leave at 1:15 AM. I rushed into the check in counter as soon as I stepped into Changi. I became THE FLASH, literally. The moment that I buckled up my seat-belt, flight attendants started to demo their take off routines. I told myself, "You stupid crammer!" I never learned my lesson.

It is your birthday. The day that I am grateful for because you're alive. I will be home to celebrate it with you. I hope you appreciated my gift for you. Time and effort.

Same day, this year, I was with friends celebrating our lives and talking about how it is supposed to be, encouraging each other and helping one another for our faith to grow. It was also our dearest friend's birthday. We bought pizza, chicken wings and celebrated it with two cakes. He is very grateful and appreciative. I saw the joy in his eyes and imagine myself if I were in his shoes that moment, I'd probably cry. Although, I didn't plan his to happen, it just happened. Although, there isn't too much effort, I am glad that I'm part of the group that made one person very happy because we have blessed and touched each and everyone's lives.

Now that my past is over and you and I parted ways, I'm still happy that you're alive. The difference is, I am no longer part of your world. 

I don't have plans for my birthday yet. Again, I'm not used to celebrating it BIGTIME! Maybe, a trip to KL would suffice. But I would also want a cake from my friends.